Metta Meditation is a type of Buddhist meditation that’s also known as loving-kindness meditation. It focuses on fostering positive feelings about both yourself and others and offers a whole range of benefits for your mind and body.
What is Metta?
Metta Meditation or loving-kindness meditation is a type of Buddhist meditation that has been used for thousands of years. In Pali (a language that’s closely related to Sanskrit and spoken in northern India) the word “metta” means positive energy and kindness towards others. The practice originates from the historical Buddha’s early discourse on immeasurable friendliness: the Metta Sutta. But you don’t have to be a Buddhist to practice Metta Meditation: anyone can do it.
An active form of meditation
Contrary to other meditation techniques, Metta is an active form of meditation where instead of focusing on your breath you focus on sending benevolent thoughts and wishes out into the world – and you imagine that the people (or animals) in your mind are touched by your good will.
A big challenge with even bigger results
The goal of Metta Meditation is to cultivate kindness, compassion and unconditional love for all living beings. So you don’t just wish happiness, safety and peace to yourself but also to people you love, people you feel indifferent to, people you consider “ a difficult person” and finally all beings everywhere. This is also the beauty of Metta Meditation: it invites you into a more loving and connected state of mind which can not only change how you see yourself but also how you see the world.
Benefits of Metta Meditation
Metta Meditation can (just like other types of meditation) benefit your mental, emotional and physical health but it’s especially useful for reducing negative emotions toward yourself and other people.
Other benefits include:
A greater sense of self-compassion: the idea behind the Metta practice is that you must love yourself before you can love other people. This self-compassion can in turn also reduce negative emotions towards yourself such as unworthiness, self-doubt, judgement, anger and/or self-criticism. As you develop self-compassion you also perceive yourself in a more positive light which promotes emotions like love and gratitude and increases your level of life satisfaction.
A decrease of stress and anxiety: a study in 2023 indicated that loving-kindness and compassion meditation significantly decreases burnout and stress. Consistent practice could also lead to improved mental health, social connections and coping skills. A smaller study in 2021 even found that a regular loving-kindness meditation practice has the ability to decrease depressive symptoms and reduce anxiety in people who suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
A decrease of some types of physical pain: mindfulness and loving-kindness meditation can provide chronic pain relief. The explanation for this has to do with the stress-relieving effect of Metta Meditation: emotional stress can worsen physical pain so less emotional stress also means lower pain levels. Negative emotions can also reduce your tolerance for pain while positive emotions (like those cultivated through Metta Meditation) have the opposite effect.
Improved longevity: as we get older, our telomeres (the DNA structures at the ends of each chromosome) naturally shorten. Chronic stress can speed up this process, causing faster biological aging while implementing meditation into your daily routine is associated with positive telomere dynamics. A Metta practice therefore could promote healthy aging.
How to practice Metta Meditation
The goal of Metta Meditation is to develop unconditional positive emotions towards all beings. This includes feelings of joy, trust, love, gratitude, happiness, appreciation and compassion. To cultivate these feelings, you silently recite phrases towards yourself and others to express kind intentions.
You don’t need any special equipment or gear and you can do this Metta practice anywhere you like such as in a quiet corner of your home, outdoors in a yard or even at your desk but try to choose a quiet and uplifting place where you’ll least likely be distracted. Set aside 15-20 minutes to complete the meditation and follow these steps:
Sit in a comfortable and relaxed position in a chair or on a meditation cushion. You can do this practice with your eyes open or closed although I prefer to do it with closed eyes. Allow your body to feel at ease and supported by the surface beneath you. Connect yourself to your breath by focusing on the inhale and exhale until your breath finds a natural flow. Let go of any concerns or preoccupations. Continue breathing deeply and focus on your breathing: feel or imagine your breath traveling through your body.
Bring your attention to your heart area. You can leave your hands comfortably rested on your knees but you can also bring a hand to your heart if you want to. Now focus on your heart and begin to offer loving-kindness to yourself by repeating silently, slowly and steadily the following (or similar) phrases to yourself: “May I be happy. May I be well. May I be safe. May I be peaceful and at ease”. Allow ample space between each phrase and allow yourself to sink into the intentions they express and acknowledge their meaning and how this makes you feel. In case feelings of warmth, friendliness or love arise in your body or mind: connect to them and allow these feelings to grow as you repeat the phrases. Maybe you’ll get distracted while doing this but that’s OK. Don’t judge yourself when this happens – just return to the phrase and keep repeating it.
After a period of directing loving-kindness toward yourself, bring to mind someone you love and care for like a family member, a friend, a pet animal or someone helpful in your life. Picture them in your mind and offer them the same phrases of loving-kindness: “May you be happy. May you be well. May you be safe. May you be peaceful and at ease”. And just like in the previous step you allow yourself again to sink into their intention or heartfelt meaning and how this makes you feel. And if any feelings of warmth, kindness or love arise: connect to them and allow them to grow as you keep repeating these phrases.
Now think of someone you with whom you have a neutral relationship such as a coworker or a shopkeeper you often see and slowly repeat those same phrases towards him or her: “May you be happy. May you be well. May you be safe. May you be peaceful and at ease”. Recognize the feelings and emotions that arise while doing this and how this makes you feel. Then bring to mind someone you consider to be a difficult person or with whom you have a negative or challenging relationship and repeat the phrases again: “May you be happy. May you be well. May you be safe. May you be peaceful and at ease”. And just like in the previous steps, you acknowledge the feelings that arise within you while saying these phrases, their meaning and how they make you feel.
In the fifth and final step you turn your attention to the universe and all beings within it (including all animals and plants) and you slowly repeat the following phrases towards all beings everywhere: “May we all be happy. May we all be well. May we all be safe. May we all be peaceful and at ease”.
Extra tip: seemingly opposite feelings such as anger, grief or sadness may also arise during loving-kindness meditation. Take these to be signs that your heart is softening and revealing what is held there. When this happens during your Metta practice, you can either shift to mindfulness practice or you can (with whatever patience, acceptance and kindness you can muster for such feelings) direct loving-kindness toward them. But above all, remember that there is no need to judge yourself for having these feelings.
One more thing…
If you’re new to meditation you might find this Metta practice intimidating. Your first few sessions might also feel unproductive. Keep in mind however that it takes time to achieve the intended effects and try the following beginner tips:
Choose phrases that truly resonate with you: you can use the phrases in the exercise above but you can also choose other similar phrases such as “May I be safe, healthy and happy”, “May you be filled with loving-kindness” or “May all beings be peaceful and filled with joy” or something else that resonates with you as long as it involves something positive that you wish for yourself and others (such as being loved, protected, free from suffering, healthy, strong etc)
It’s important to repeat each phrase that you decide to use with great intention and mindfulness. This helps you really focus in on the phrase and the associated emotions for yourself or for the other person(s) or living beings.
There is no right or wrong number of phrases to use and there is no right or wrong number of times to repeat your chosen phrases either. Repeat them as many times as you wish.
Take as long as you need in each step: maybe finding compassion for yourself is difficult for you and you can’t move beyond that at first. If that’s the case then work on loving yourself first and practice that self-love for as long as it takes for you to be comfortable and at peace with yourself. Then, you can move on to the other steps. Metta Meditation isn’t about moving quickly from one step to another: the point is to truly connect with compassion and loving-kindness with yourself and others so be patient and understanding with yourself as you attempt this.
Work your way up gradually: don’t immediately try to practice Metta with a very difficult person in mind. You first need to develop the capacity to work with the aversion and despair that may arise – and this takes quite a bit of time and practice. Which is why I strongly advise beginners to start off “light” when they’re thinking of a difficult person. For example, maybe you went out to dinner last night and the waitress was rude to you or maybe you got annoyed by the person sitting next to you on the bus or train this morning because they were talking loudly on their phone the whole ride. You could also think of someone you’ve had a disagreement with or even the yappy little dog next door that tends to bark for hours on end and its neglectful owners.
Let go of perfection: your mind will likely drift, so don’t worry about getting distracted. Just acknowledge that this is natural. Try to focus on the present moment instead of the potential results.
Avoid judging yourself: when you get distracted, avoid criticizing yourself. Recognize the distraction and gently return to the practice.
Experiment: Metta Meditation can be done in any location or pose and at whatever time works best for you. There are no strict rules on what will and won’t work for you: it’s trial and error. So simply try meditating in different places and poses and at different times of the day to find what works best for you.
Do you have any experience with Metta Meditation? I would love to hear your view on this practice in the comments below!
©HolisticHappiness2024
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